Angry, Bitter and Hateful People

“ Bitter describes a person who takes any statement as a personal insult. It doesn't even matter if the statement is about them at all or not. “

Angry, hateful and bitter people often create problems in workplace, friendships and relationship because they believe that if they are unhappy in their lives, then others must suffer.   I’m sitting here trying to figure out what makes people bitter and angry and I’ve come to conclusions, that they have trouble getting past the disappointments in their life.  People will dwell on them, and hold on to the past and it becomes a key factor in their life in a negative way. They hold in pain and hurt so long, as the times progresses on, they will take it out on anyone involved in their life.   I guess maybe they can’t just handle disappointments,  and they end up being bitter and hateful.  I understand that there are some folks  out there that may have negative feelings toward people and may have valid reasons to be angry, but at the same time, there are others just wish to avoid responsibility for their own failings.

In general, I think we as people need to learn how to do things to be happy. Happiness should be part of our life. We need to learn to be happy, not being angry and bitter.

 

Compromising values... Is it worth it?

I'm working on a blog right now.. This should be posted sometime next week.. It'll be very intense and very interesting. Meanwhile.. read up on some of my old posts from myspace... It never gets old, but hopefully you'll learn something new from this.

Is it really worth it? Do we compromise our values, just to give that person what they want?

One of the mistakes I learned from compromising your values is that people who compromise values for many reasons. Sometime we may ignore one of our values simply to please the people in your life. I know it's not good at all. Friendship, Relationship, Associates.. etc… it's about trust, acceptance, appreciation, love and honesty. We simply cannot afford to be anything than who you really are within a relationship or friendship... I think it's important that we should remain true to ourselves. Today, I learned that there are many people out there who are not being true themselves, constantly faking friendship or relationship, etc and yet they wonder why they can't keep someone in their life.

I guess we should understand that committing to being genuine and true to your values is the key here. Man, don't ever let anyone compromise your values no matter what. Our parent raised us according to their values, and we will raise our children according to our values that our parent instilled in us, so it's very important that we stick to what we believe in and not compromise it at all. If anyone comes along and he or she may insist that your value is not of importance to them, therefore it shouldn't be to you. Right? WRONG! Remember our values are extremely valuable to us, and it's important that we remain true to it. If you give in and let that person have their way; believe me, you will regret it. I made this mistake and still regret it to this day.

Whatever relationship we have with certain person (Love, business, social, etc...), it's based on acceptance of each others values. I feel like we shouldn't even attempt to convince someone that their value is wrong. I think that there is nothing wrong with expressing our values to anyone, but to convince them to change theirs when they do not agree with us is not right.

When we compromise our important values… it will cause us to lose in two ways: You will resent that person, and you will not be happy. Second thing is that we're going to regret it no matter how we handle it……..

Consider it lesson learned for me…….I should've never compromised my values when it counted the most…….

Nothing about nothing....

So, how do I write something about something that I'm not sure how to say it? There are so many things racing through my mind about things that's going on in my life. It's so hard to express any of this. I guess I am trying to figure out what kind of direction I want to go with this, because as I continue my journey as a black man, I'm trying to figure out who's going to come along with me on this journey, and how do I move forward with this? Maybe, I'm still trying to sort my thoughts out, so that I can finally resolve some things.. maybe.. I don't know. I think we'll know more in the near future.. I guess we'll have to wait and see... Right now, I know that only one person truly understand me, how I feel, what I am thinking and that is God. More on that later....

J

Change is coming....

My mother reminded me that in the past few weeks, I've really changed and she's not sure whether it's for the best or for the worse. but at the same time. She said that it could be a good thing for me, because I am just now discovering what I want v.s. what I need in my life, and how I go about it is the hard part. I wasn't sure what she meant by that.

It took me long time to figure it out, and I think I know what mom was trying to tell me. Everyone is always trying to change their looks, personality, feelings toward people, and often we forget about our spiritually changes.
It appears that we have placed ourselves in a mind-set that often requires a tragedy to occur before specific change takes place. Sometimes we are allowed by God to do some rather stupid things so we can see the poverty of our life and make a change. Tragedy and stupidity doesn't have to be the catalyst that brings change into our lives. I don't want to get into too deep details about it, but I hope everyone gets the idea.

Your life can ONLY be as great as you believe it to be.
Believe your life is small, you shall have a small life.
Believe your life is weak, you shall have a weak life.
Believe in fear, you will experience fear.
Believe in sickness, you will experience sickness.
Believe your life is big, and your life will be BIG.

So I've always wanted to make changes in my life, and this is great opportunity to say it on here, and make good on my own promises.

Lesson learned at age of 27

Sometime in our relentless effort to find the person we love, we fail to recognize and appreciate the people who love us.We miss out so many beautiful things and simply because we allow ourselves to be enslaved by our own selfish concerns. I learned that the best lovers are those who are capable of loving from a distance, far enough allow the person to grow, but never too far to feel the love within our being. I learned that to let go of someone you truly love doesn't mean you have to stop loving, stop being there for them, stop being their friend, stop being a positive influence on her, stop comforting her, it only means that you allow that person to find their own happiness without expecting them to come back. Letting go is not just setting the person free, but it is also setting yourself free from all the fears ,bitterness, hatred , and anger that we keep in our heart. When we see the sadness in the person we love, we know at that moment, you only want them to be happy, and by doing so, you're letting it go. That's something I'm really struggling with in the last few weeks.

Sometime we need a reminder that we should never allow the bitterness take away our strength and allow it to weaken your faith,and never allow pain to dishearten you,but rather let you grow with wisdom in bearing it. I think that by letting them go, we allows ourselves to find peace in loving someone from a distance not expecting anything in return. We deal with nothing but beautiful memories of the past that we shared, leaving the bad out, and at same time, real peace and happiness come only with open acceptance of what reality is today. We also have to learn to forgive and forget. We often hear people saying that they can forgive, but won't forget. To me, by saying that, we haven't really let go of the past, and we're using the past to hold us back. To order to move on, and be a better person, we have to FORGIVE AND FORGET things in the past and I know that it is very diff cult to do so, but it's critical to every one of us, because by doing that, you're allowing yourself to grow and become a better person. We have to give ourselves to find out what we are capable of giving, but how can we do that if we can't forgive and forget?

There come a time in our lives when we get a chance meeting someone so nice and we find ourselves getting so intensely attracted to that person.This feeling soon become a part of our everyday lives and eventually consumes our thoughts and actions. The sad part of it is when we begin to realize that this person feels nothing more for us than just friendship,or the feelings for you is just too far from how you love her. The sad part is that person may never tell you how they feels. That's when we start our desperate attempts to get noticed and be closer and in the end our efforts are still unrewarded and we end up being sorry for ourselves.

A friend of mine reminded me that we dont have to be bitter on love,We don't have to give up on love. What we need is to learn to accept the verdict of reality without being bitter or sorry for ourselves. Believe me, we would be better off giving that dedication and love to someone more deserving, that can gives the same thing in return. Don't allow our heart run our life, be sensible and let your mind speak for itself. Listen not only to your feeling but to reason as well. That's the key part to love, because it allows us to look within ourself, and find what we want.

I learned today that if we lose someone today, it means that someone better is coming tomorrow: It might be the same person you love, but as a better person than ever before. Or it might be someone else better. We loses love all the time and that doesn't mean that we failed in love. The best thing about love is that it finds a way. If we need to cry, it's okay, but we have to make sure that the tears washes away the hurts and the bitterness that the past has left with you. We have to let go of yesterday and love will find it's way back to us. And when it does, pray that it maybe the love that will stay and last a lifetime. We have to remember that to learn to let a person go, you have to expect them to not come back, because we don't want to set ourselves up for false hopes, and if true love prevails, that person will come back, if it doesn't, then someone better will be here tomorrow. We understand that love is not about sharing same common interests, but rather sharing the same chemistry and respecting one's other.

I know that when we lose someone we love, and we think that person were the one who we loved the most, between two of us, to us, whoever we loved lost more. The reason I said that is because someday, we can love someone the way that we loved the person, and the person we loved will never be loved the way I did.

I know that by letting a person go and allowing them to do their own thing, we are becoming a better person, and maybe be a better friend, be a better person, with a better understanding of love is and how it works. I know that in love, anything is possible and that it's okay to be happy. We can't force another people to feel what we feels, we can only speak what's coming from our heart and leave it up to God to handle it. If it's meant to be, she'll be back, if it's not, God will send me someone else. Either way, I know that I'll always be there for her, anything she needs, I'm here. I just hope that she knows that, because I really do care for her, and I love her very much. I do realize that I am jealous person, I'm an arse, conceited, annoying, jackass, selfish, but at same time, I know she see the good in me. True story...

Was lost.. but now I'm finding a way to be found.

I wrote this two years ago, and I realized that during my journey of figuring out what I want from life... I realized that I actually took a different path without realizing it, and I need to do something about that, so I can get back on track... Enjoy this post...

You know what I've learned something interesting this past weekend, and finding ideal woman is real hard these day. How do I know when there is a perfect woman out there for me? How do I know whether my dream girl is the ideal woman for me? I thought about it, and It took me long time, and here's what I've come to conclusion: Perfection is an ideal situation where everything is just the way it should be, no flaws, no irregularities. So basically, a perfect state or condition, there is seamless integration and functioning of all elements and components. So basically, what I am saying is that.... there is no such things as perfection. It is not possible. I think we've spent all of our life striving for perfection. We aim for the ideal state, and yet it can not be achievable. It's just a illusion to us. That's what I've had to come to grasp with this concept this past weekend. There is no such things as a perfect woman. No woman is perfect. The ideal woman is not a perfect woman, but one who comes close. By understanding the concept of perfect, it helps you put your priorities in the right places. I do believe though that there is women out there who comes close to perfections than other. I do believe that the closer the woman is to perfection, better it is for you and the relationship.

So I had to ask myself this question: What makes a woman the ideal woman for me? To find out that, I had to sit down and write down criteria and I realized something else.. Everyone just wanted to be happy. Thats' the most important thing.. be happy. What I yearn for is a loving and caring woman, who is honest and trustworthy in relationship. I want a lady, who is committed to the relationship 100 percent. When certain situation arise, She has to be firm and decisive and be at peace with her decisions. I want someone who believes in sharing and caring for other people. Be considerate of other people's feelings and know when to help out. I want a lady who is God-Fearing woman, who attends church every Sunday with me. She doesn't have to be a perfect Christian, but at least make effort to be the best Christian. Most important of all, She has to be simple. Lead a simple lifestyle. Her lifestyle, uncluttered and uncomplicated. Just keep it simple. Over the years, I've chose women based on their looks, and I realized I've been going about it the wrong way. Virtues of a woman lasts lifetime.. Outward appearance fade with time. I guess I am finally understanding what I want out of a woman.. and I'm only 27 years old.. Maybe something good will happen to me this year, who knows? I may have made mistakes over the years, but I'm determined to not make the same mistakes again. I'm really going to have to learn to be patient, and look for those qualities in each women I meet.

Beauty of An Angel

Never can I forget the day
That day at the park
Holding each other for hours
I'll never forget that day
Your sweet soft kisses,
From those precious lips,
I never thought this day would exist.
Feeling the heartbeat of an angel right next to mine,
You sent chills up my spine
When I felt your soft touch.
It's the way you made my heart race
When you put your pretty face on my chest,
How your angelic voice made me smile,
Even just to hear you sighs.
Staring into those deep brown eyes,
Playing with your beautiful hair,
All I wanted to do was hold you and stare
No matter how im feeling, you bring a smile to my heart.
You truly are a blessing that I can't let pass me by.